It is a difficult transition for children to take on the role of taking care of their parents. Many may feel like they do not have the time or the resources to properly take care of them. Additionally, the parent may feel embarrassed and frustrated with their inability to completely function on their own. When looking for assisted care for your parents, it is important they still feel a sense of independence. You can help your parents continue to feel independent by involving them in the decision-making process, thoughtfully considering their location, and scheduling visits.
Involve Them in All Decisions
While your parents are unable to safely care for themselves, they are still adults with opinions. Their healthcare priorities may be different than what you perceive. Let them make decisions for themselves and their own care. Taking away their agency will decrease their confidence and feelings of value. While your parents are still capable, let them decide how they are looked after.
When looking for a care facility, it is important to find one that is central to their family, their doctor, and any other places they like to frequent. Your parents need to be able to access these places easily for their physical and mental well-being. This will help them avoid memory lapses and will help you feel confident that they are receiving the proper medical and social care.
Keep a routine to help them familiarize themselves with their new living environment and how they will get to around on their own. It is important for them to be close to their doctor and anyone else they see for appointments and that they know how they are getting to these places.
Most parents feel protective and confident when they have their children gathered for dinner. You can help your parents feel similarly independent when you schedule visits either individually or with your children in an environment where they are in control. Let your parents play the role of the host. Even if your parents cannot leave their care facility, visit them often to remind them of their family and give them opportunities to socialize.
Transitioning to a care facility can be a difficult process for you and your parents. Help them maintain their independence by involving them in the decision-making process, considering location, and scheduling visits. This will make the transition much smoother and encouraging.
Do you need help setting up end of life care? We’ve got you covered!
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